{"id":2851,"date":"2026-06-16T10:00:00","date_gmt":"2026-06-16T08:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/name-it-to-tame-it\/"},"modified":"2026-11-02T15:01:33","modified_gmt":"2026-11-02T14:01:33","slug":"name-it-to-tame-it","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/name-it-to-tame-it\/","title":{"rendered":"Name It to Tame It"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<style>\n\/* The accent is a light-background device. 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ask(){\nif(busy){return;}\nbusy=true;\nif(window.requestAnimationFrame){window.requestAnimationFrame(sync);}\nelse{window.setTimeout(sync,50);}\n}\nwindow.addEventListener(\"scroll\",ask,{passive:true});\nwindow.addEventListener(\"resize\",ask);\nwindow.addEventListener(\"orientationchange\",ask);\nwindow.addEventListener(\"load\",ask);\ndocument.addEventListener(\"focusin\",function(e){typing=field(e.target);ask();});\ndocument.addEventListener(\"focusout\",function(){typing=false;ask();});\nif(MQ){\nif(MQ.addEventListener){MQ.addEventListener(\"change\",ask);}\nelse if(MQ.addListener){MQ.addListener(ask);}\n}\nask();\n})();<\/script>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group alignfull eqp has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-69fa9525 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\" style=\"margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0;padding:0px 22px\">\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d12c95ff wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n<div style=\"color:#6b6259;font-size:clamp(14px, 0.875rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.455), 18px);font-style:normal;font-weight:400;margin-top:54px;margin-bottom:0\" class=\"has-link-color wp-elements-1 wp-block-post-date has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\"><time datetime=\"2026-06-16T10:00:00+02:00\">16 lipnja, 2026<\/time><\/div>\n\n<div style=\"color:#6b6259;font-size:clamp(14px, 0.875rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.455), 18px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;text-transform:uppercase;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0\" class=\"taxonomy-category has-link-color wp-elements-2 wp-block-post-terms has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\"><a href=\"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/category\/body-and-mind\/\" rel=\"tag\">Body and Mind<\/a><\/div>\n\n\n<h1 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-playfair-display-font-family\" id=\"top\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:12px;margin-bottom:16px;font-size:clamp(24.034px, 1.502rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 1.814), 40px);font-style:normal;font-weight:800;line-height:1.15\">Name It to Tame It<\/h1>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#524a42;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:22px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.55\">Why putting a feeling into words takes some of the heat out of it, why the precise word matters, and how to find it, for yourself or for a child<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"eq-credit\" style=\"--eq-credit-ac:#b83a55\">Written by <a href=\"\/our-team-ivana\/\" rel=\"author\">Ivana<\/a>, psychologist and psychotherapist<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#6b6259;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0;font-size:clamp(14px, 0.875rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.114), 15px);line-height:1.5\"><strong style=\"color:#b83a55\">10 minute read<\/strong> &nbsp;&middot;&nbsp; 2,164 words<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<!-- eq-post-top -->\n<div class=\"pt-on\" hidden data-src=\"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/10\/name-it-to-tame-it-post-top.jpg\" data-w=\"470\" data-aspect=\"0.532\" data-side=\"left\" data-bleed=\"\"><\/div>\n<script>\n\/* Post tops: turns the post's masthead group into the cream band and adds the\n   drawing beside the words. 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You\u2019ve snapped at someone who didn\u2019t deserve it, you can\u2019t settle to anything, and when a friend asks what\u2019s wrong, the only answer you can find is that you\u2019re stressed. Later, on the walk home, the real word arrives. It wasn\u2019t stress. It was disappointment, about something you\u2019d been looking forward to that fell through.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Something often shifts at that point. The feeling doesn\u2019t disappear, but it gets easier to hold. <strong class=\"eqb\">It has a shape now, and a name, and a reason<\/strong>. If you\u2019ve ever felt that small click of relief, you already know what this article is about.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">The psychiatrist <span class=\"gl\" tabindex=\"0\" aria-describedby=\"gd-1\">Daniel Siegel<span class=\"gd\" role=\"tooltip\" id=\"gd-1\"><b>Daniel Siegel<\/b>American psychiatrist and clinical professor of psychiatry at UCLA, known for his writing on the developing mind and on parenting, and for the phrase name it to tame it.<\/span><\/span> has a phrase for this, from a book he wrote with Tina Payne Bryson on helping children through big feelings: <em class=\"eqi\">name it to tame it<\/em>. It\u2019s a slogan, and his explanation of why it works is his own. But researchers have since tested the simplest part of it, putting a feeling into a word, in adults as well as children, and some of what they found is surprising.<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-background has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-4ccedd2e wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\" style=\"border-color:#e8e1d5;border-width:1.5px;border-style:solid;border-radius:22px;background-color:#faf8f3;margin-top:56px;margin-bottom:20px;padding:30px 34px\">\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#6b6259;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:22px;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:0.16em;line-height:1.4\">WHAT THIS ARTICLE COVERS &middot; THREE PARTS<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-rank-math-toc-block\">\n<div class=\"eq-toc\"><details><summary><svg class=\"chev\" viewBox=\"0 0 12 12\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M4 2l4 4-4 4\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"1.7\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"\/><\/svg><span class=\"num\">PART 1<\/span><a class=\"ttl\" href=\"#part-1\">What naming a feeling does<\/a><span class=\"cnt\"><span class=\"sec\">3 sections<\/span><span class=\"sep\"> &middot; <\/span>3 min<\/span><\/summary><ul><li><a href=\"#psychologists-call-it-affect-labeling\">Psychologists call it affect labeling<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"#it-helps-more-than-people-expect\">It helps more than people expect<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"#it-softens-good-feelings-too\">It softens good feelings too<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/details><details><summary><svg class=\"chev\" viewBox=\"0 0 12 12\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M4 2l4 4-4 4\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"1.7\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"\/><\/svg><span class=\"num\">PART 2<\/span><a class=\"ttl\" href=\"#part-2\">Why the precise word matters<\/a><span class=\"cnt\"><span class=\"sec\">2 sections<\/span><span class=\"sep\"> &middot; <\/span>2 min<\/span><\/summary><ul><li><a href=\"#it-works-outside-the-laboratory-too\">It works outside the laboratory too<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"#bad-is-not-a-feeling-you-can-do-much-with\">Bad isn\u2019t a feeling you can do much with<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/details><details><summary><svg class=\"chev\" viewBox=\"0 0 12 12\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M4 2l4 4-4 4\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"1.7\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"\/><\/svg><span class=\"num\">PART 3<\/span><a class=\"ttl\" href=\"#part-3\">How to name it to tame it<\/a><span class=\"cnt\"><span class=\"sec\">4 sections<\/span><span class=\"sep\"> &middot; <\/span>5 min<\/span><\/summary><ul><li><a href=\"#find-the-most-accurate-word-you-can\">Find the most accurate word you can<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"#keep-it-short\">Keep it short<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"#name-it-then-let-it-be\">Name it, then let it be<\/a><\/li><li><a href=\"#it-helps-with-children-too\">It helps with children too<\/a><\/li><\/ul><\/details><\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div style=\"margin-top:92px;margin-bottom:34px\"><div class=\"wt-part tm\"><div class=\"no\"><svg viewBox=\"44 0 90 90\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path class=\"tg\" style=\"stroke-width:0.95\" d=\"M117.1 45.8C115.6 48.1 110.5 55.7 107.7 59.6C104.9 63.5 103.1 68.6 100.3 69.1C97.5 69.7 94.8 63.2 90.9 62.9C87.0 62.6 81.8 69.2 76.8 67.5C71.9 65.8 60.3 56.7 61.0 52.8C61.8 49.0 78.5 47.9 81.5 44.4C84.5 40.9 77.2 33.8 78.9 31.7C80.5 29.6 86.8 33.7 91.4 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37.6 82.8 33.5C84.9 29.5 78.3 25.2 79.5 23.7C80.8 22.1 86.2 25.7 90.1 24.3C94.1 23.0 98.9 16.1 103.2 15.5C107.4 14.8 114.4 16.6 115.5 20.6C116.6 24.5 108.5 33.4 109.9 39.1C111.3 44.7 124.1 50.1 123.9 54.6C123.7 59.1 114.2 65.0 108.6 66.2C103.1 67.4 98.1 62.6 90.6 61.8C83.0 61.0 68.3 63.3 63.6 61.6C58.8 59.9 62.8 56.7 62.2 51.7C61.6 46.6 57.1 35.6 59.9 31.4C62.6 27.2 74.2 26.6 78.5 26.6C82.9 26.5 82.3 30.0 85.7 31.3C89.0 32.5 94.8 34.2 98.8 33.9C102.9 33.7 108.1 27.4 109.9 29.8C111.8 32.3 108.4 41.5 110.0 48.8C111.6 56.1 121.6 70.8 119.7 73.8C117.8 76.8 104.6 66.4 98.8 67.0C93.0 67.6 89.7 75.7 85.0 77.3C80.3 78.9 73.0 81.0 70.8 76.6C68.5 72.1 72.0 55.5 71.6 50.9C71.2 46.2 69.0 52.0 68.4 48.5C67.8 45.1 64.8 32.5 67.9 30.2C71.0 27.9 83.0 34.5 87.2 34.9C91.4 35.3 87.9 32.9 93.0 32.5C98.1 32.1 112.8 30.1 117.5 32.4C122.2 34.8 124.7 42.4 121.2 46.5C117.7 50.6 100.2 53.5 96.4 57.2C92.6 61.0 101.0 65.8 98.3 69.1C95.6 72.3 86.1 76.2 80.1 76.7C74.0 77.2 63.7 75.7 62.0 72.2C60.3 68.7 68.5 60.7 69.8 56.0C71.1 51.2 69.1 46.0 69.7 43.5C70.3 41.1 69.9 42.2 73.3 41.1C76.8 39.9 86.8 36.6 90.4 36.6C94.1 36.5 90.7 39.9 95.4 40.7C100.1 41.5 115.4 39.8 118.6 41.3C121.8 42.8 115.4 48.5 114.7 50.0\"\/><ellipse class=\"ey\" cx=\"83.9\" cy=\"36.8\" rx=\"4.6\" ry=\"5.8\"\/><circle class=\"pu\" cx=\"82.9\" cy=\"34.8\" r=\"2.3\"\/><ellipse class=\"ey\" cx=\"94.9\" cy=\"36.8\" rx=\"4.6\" ry=\"5.8\"\/><circle class=\"pu\" cx=\"93.9\" cy=\"34.8\" r=\"2.3\"\/><path class=\"ag\" d=\"M108 9l3-7M117 15l7-4M122 25l7-1M126 52l4 3-4 3 4 3\"\/><\/svg><\/div><div class=\"tx\"><p class=\"lb\">Part one of three<\/p><h2 id=\"part-1\">What naming a feeling does<\/h2><p class=\"sb\">The research on putting feelings into words, and why it rarely feels like it\u2019s working<\/p><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d12c95ff wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"psychologists-call-it-affect-labeling\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">Psychologists call it affect labeling<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Picture yourself saying it, out loud or just in your head: \u201cI\u2019m really anxious about tomorrow.\u201d Nothing about tomorrow has changed. So can a word do anything at all?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">In research, putting a feeling into words is called <em class=\"eqi\">affect labeling<\/em>, where affect just means feeling or emotion. The idea that it helps is old. What\u2019s newer is measuring what it does.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">In one of the first brain-scan studies of this, researchers asked people to look at pictures of faces showing strong emotions while their brains were scanned. Sometimes they picked the word that named the emotion on the face. Other times they did a different task with the same faces.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">When people named the emotion, the amygdala, a part of the brain closely involved in detecting threat and reacting to it, responded less strongly. At the same time, an area at the front of the brain linked to regulating emotion became more active. <strong class=\"eqb\">Putting a word to it seemed to turn the brain\u2019s alarm down a notch.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">That was one study, and a brain scan on its own can\u2019t tell us how someone feels. But the finding has been followed up in several ways since. A later review of hundreds of brain-scan studies found the same pattern: when emotion words were part of the task, the amygdala was less often active.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"it-helps-more-than-people-expect\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">It helps more than people expect<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Here\u2019s the part I find most fascinating. In a later set of studies, the same research group asked people how upset they felt while looking at unpleasant pictures. When they put the feeling into a word, they felt less upset than when they just looked, and about as much better as when they deliberately reframed the picture or took their mind off it.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Then the researchers asked people to predict what naming would do. Before you read on, have a guess yourself.<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div style=\"margin-top:34px;margin-bottom:40px\"><style>\n.nt-gs{margin:0;background:#faf8f3;border:1.5px solid #ebe4d6;border-radius:20px;padding:clamp(22px,3.4vw,34px)}\n.nt-gs .hd{display:flex;justify-content:space-between;align-items:baseline;gap:16px;margin:0 0 14px}\n.nt-gs .ti{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.14em;text-transform:uppercase;color:#2d2a35;margin:0}\n.nt-gs .un{font-size:13px;color:#6b6259;margin:0}\n.nt-gs .qq{font-size:clamp(18px,calc(12px + .9vw),22px);font-weight:600;line-height:1.45;color:#2a2622;margin:0 0 16px}\n.nt-gs .opts{display:flex;flex-wrap:wrap;gap:10px;margin:0}\n.nt-gs .opts button{font:600 16px\/1.2 \"Work Sans\",sans-serif;min-height:44px;padding:11px 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minmax(0,1fr);align-items:center;gap:12px;padding:13px 18px;border-top:1px solid #ebe4d6}\n.nt-gs .rw:first-child{border-top:0}\n.nt-gs .rh{padding-top:12px;padding-bottom:10px}\n.nt-gs .rh span{font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.12em;text-transform:uppercase;color:#6b6259}\n.nt-gs .st{font-size:clamp(16px,calc(11.6px + .72vw),18px);font-weight:600;line-height:1.35;color:#2a2622}\n.nt-gs .ar{display:flex;align-items:center;gap:8px;font-size:15px;line-height:1.3;color:#2d2a35}\n.nt-gs .ar svg{flex:0 0 auto;width:16px;height:21px;fill:none;stroke:currentColor;stroke-width:2.2;stroke-linecap:round;stroke-linejoin:round}\n.nt-gs .ar.ex{color:#6b6259}\n.nt-gs .ar.ex svg{stroke-dasharray:3 3}\n.nt-gs .hi{background:#fbe9ed}\n.nt-gs .hi .st{color:#8a3040}\n.nt-gs .hi .ar{color:#8a3040;font-weight:600}\n.nt-gs figcaption{font-size:15.5px;line-height:1.6;color:#6b6259;margin:16px 0 0;padding-top:14px;border-top:1px solid #ebe4d6}\n@media(max-width:560px){.nt-gs .rw{grid-template-columns:minmax(0,1.2fr) minmax(0,1fr) minmax(0,1fr);gap:8px;padding:12px 12px}.nt-gs .ar{flex-direction:column;align-items:flex-start;gap:3px;font-size:14px}.nt-gs .rh span{font-size:12px;letter-spacing:.08em}}\n@media(max-width:520px){.nt-gs{padding:20px 14px;border-radius:16px;margin:0 -12px!important}}\n@media(prefers-reduced-motion:reduce){.nt-gs .opts button{transition:none!important}.nt-gs.js.done .rv{animation:none}}\n@media print{.nt-gs .opts,.nt-gs .un{display:none!important}.nt-gs.js .rv,.nt-gs.js figcaption{display:block}}\n<\/style><figure class=\"nt-gs\" id=\"nt-gs\"><div class=\"hd\"><p class=\"ti\">Guess first<\/p><p class=\"un\">tap an answer<\/p><\/div><p class=\"qq\" id=\"nt-gq\">You put a strong feeling into a word: \u201cI\u2019m furious.\u201d What happens to the feeling?<\/p><div class=\"opts\" role=\"group\" aria-labelledby=\"nt-gq\"><button type=\"button\" data-g=\"up\" aria-pressed=\"false\">It gets stronger<\/button><button type=\"button\" data-g=\"down\" aria-pressed=\"false\">It eases<\/button><button type=\"button\" data-g=\"same\" aria-pressed=\"false\">No real change<\/button><\/div><div class=\"rv\" id=\"nt-grv\" tabindex=\"-1\"><p class=\"ans\" id=\"nt-gans\" aria-live=\"polite\"><\/p><div class=\"tb\" role=\"table\" aria-label=\"What people expected each strategy to do, and what it did\"><div class=\"rw rh\" role=\"row\"><span role=\"columnheader\">Strategy<\/span><span role=\"columnheader\">They expected<\/span><span role=\"columnheader\">What happened<\/span><\/div><div class=\"rw\" role=\"row\"><span class=\"st\" role=\"rowheader\">Reframe the picture<\/span><span class=\"ar ex\" role=\"cell\"><svg viewBox=\"0 0 18 22\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M9 2v17M3 13l6 6 6-6\"\/><\/svg><span>less upset<\/span><\/span><span class=\"ar hp\" role=\"cell\"><svg viewBox=\"0 0 18 22\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M9 2v17M3 13l6 6 6-6\"\/><\/svg><span>less upset<\/span><\/span><\/div><div class=\"rw\" role=\"row\"><span class=\"st\" role=\"rowheader\">Take your mind off it<\/span><span class=\"ar ex\" role=\"cell\"><svg viewBox=\"0 0 18 22\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M9 2v17M3 13l6 6 6-6\"\/><\/svg><span>less upset<\/span><\/span><span class=\"ar hp\" role=\"cell\"><svg viewBox=\"0 0 18 22\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M9 2v17M3 13l6 6 6-6\"\/><\/svg><span>less upset<\/span><\/span><\/div><div class=\"rw hi\" role=\"row\"><span class=\"st\" role=\"rowheader\">Name the feeling<\/span><span class=\"ar ex\" role=\"cell\"><svg viewBox=\"0 0 18 22\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M9 20V3M3 9l6-6 6 6\"\/><\/svg><span>more upset<\/span><\/span><span class=\"ar hp\" role=\"cell\"><svg viewBox=\"0 0 18 22\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path d=\"M9 2v17M3 13l6 6 6-6\"\/><\/svg><span>less upset<\/span><\/span><\/div><\/div><\/div><figcaption>Direction only: whether people felt, or expected to feel, more or less upset than when they just looked at the pictures. From one set of studies with unpleasant pictures.<\/figcaption><script>(function(){var f=document.getElementById(\"nt-gs\");if(!f){return;}f.classList.add(\"js\");var RM=false;if(window.matchMedia){RM=window.matchMedia(\"(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)\").matches;}var bs=f.querySelectorAll(\".opts button\"),ans=document.getElementById(\"nt-gans\"),rv=document.getElementById(\"nt-grv\");var T={up:\"That\u2019s what people in the studies expected too. It isn\u2019t what happened, though.\",down:\"Right! And it\u2019s the answer people in the studies didn\u2019t expect.\",same:\"That\u2019s how it feels from the inside, which is part of the puzzle. People said they felt less upset.\"};Array.prototype.forEach.call(bs,function(b){b.addEventListener(\"click\",function(){Array.prototype.forEach.call(bs,function(x){x.setAttribute(\"aria-pressed\",String(x===b));});ans.textContent=T[b.getAttribute(\"data-g\")];f.classList.add(\"done\");});});})();<\/script><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d12c95ff wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">On average, people expected naming to make them feel worse. <strong class=\"eqb\">Even right after it had helped them, they still predicted it would make things worse next time.<\/strong> So if naming a feeling sounds a bit pointless to you, the people in these studies thought so too, and it may still be worth a try!<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">That\u2019s part of why researchers describe affect labeling as a quiet, almost automatic way of calming a feeling. They call it <em class=\"eqi\">implicit<\/em>, because it doesn\u2019t feel like you\u2019re trying to change anything. You\u2019re only describing it. The effect happens anyway, often without you noticing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"it-softens-good-feelings-too\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">It softens good feelings too<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">The same studies found something on the other side, too. When people named their response to pleasant pictures, they enjoyed them less as well. <strong class=\"eqb\">Naming seems to turn the volume down on feelings in general<\/strong>, not only on the painful ones.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">That\u2019s useful when a feeling is too loud. My own take is that it may also be a reason not to narrate every lovely moment while it\u2019s still happening.<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<style>.eqp .eq-kp{display:grid;grid-template-columns:auto minmax(0,1fr);gap:4px 16px;align-items:start;background:#f7f1f2;border:0;border-left:4px solid #3a3442;border-radius:4px 18px 18px 4px;padding:20px 26px;margin:6px 0 34px}.eqp .eq-kp .mk{grid-row:1\/3;width:40px;height:40px;border-radius:50%;background:#fff;color:#3a3442;display:flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center}.eqp .eq-kp .mk svg{width:21px;height:21px}.eqp .eq-kp .k{font-family:\"Work Sans\",sans-serif;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.16em;text-transform:uppercase;color:#3a3442;margin:2px 0 4px}.eqp .eq-kp .t{font-family:\"Work Sans\",sans-serif;font-size:clamp(15px,calc(10.6px + .72vw),19px);font-weight:500;line-height:1.55;color:#2a2622;margin:0}@media(max-width:560px){.eqp .eq-kp{grid-template-columns:minmax(0,1fr);padding:18px 20px}.eqp .eq-kp .mk{grid-row:auto;width:34px;height:34px}}<\/style><aside class=\"eq-kp\"><span class=\"mk\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"1.7\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"><path d=\"M6.5 3.5h11a1 1 0 0 1 1 1v15.6a.5.5 0 0 1-.78.42L12 16.4l-5.72 4.12a.5.5 0 0 1-.78-.42V4.5a1 1 0 0 1 1-1z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><p class=\"k\">Worth remembering<\/p><p class=\"t\">Putting a feeling into a word or two tends to take some of the heat out of it, even though it rarely feels like it\u2019s doing anything at the time.<\/p><\/aside>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"margin-top:92px;margin-bottom:34px\"><div class=\"wt-part tm\"><div class=\"no\"><svg viewBox=\"44 0 90 90\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path class=\"tg\" style=\"stroke-width:1.05\" d=\"M125.1 41.7C124.2 44.7 122.8 54.8 119.6 60.1C116.4 65.4 109.4 73.7 106.0 73.5C102.6 73.3 103.9 60.0 99.1 58.8C94.2 57.6 81.1 67.9 76.8 66.1C72.5 64.4 72.5 52.0 73.3 48.4C74.1 44.8 79.7 47.1 81.7 44.7C83.8 42.4 82.4 35.6 85.8 34.2C89.2 32.9 97.3 37.7 102.0 36.8C106.7 35.9 111.8 27.3 114.0 28.8C116.2 30.3 115.0 42.3 115.2 45.8C115.5 49.2 114.2 45.6 115.6 49.4C116.9 53.1 124.0 63.6 123.4 68.5C122.8 73.4 116.6 78.4 111.9 78.9C107.2 79.5 99.1 73.3 95.2 71.7C91.3 70.2 89.4 73.3 88.3 69.7C87.3 66.0 89.5 54.3 89.0 49.9C88.4 45.5 84.8 45.1 85.0 43.2C85.2 41.2 87.9 41.9 90.2 38.1C92.6 34.3 95.3 22.7 99.1 20.6C102.9 18.4 109.6 23.2 113.0 25.2C116.3 27.2 117.6 28.7 119.2 32.6C120.8 36.5 122.9 44.2 122.8 48.4C122.6 52.7 120.7 53.7 118.3 57.9C115.9 62.1 111.7 71.7 108.3 73.5C104.8 75.4 101.3 70.2 97.6 68.8C93.9 67.5 87.5 67.6 86.0 65.3C84.5 62.9 88.8 57.6 88.6 54.6C88.4 51.7 87.0 50.7 84.9 47.6C82.9 44.6 74.8 39.3 76.3 36.2C77.8 33.2 89.1 30.9 93.9 29.5C98.6 28.1 101.1 26.2 104.8 27.9C108.6 29.7 112.8 37.1 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40.6 97.8 41.1C101.2 41.6 108.8 35.0 110.3 36.4C111.8 37.8 107.4 45.3 106.8 49.4C106.2 53.4 107.6 57.0 106.6 60.6C105.5 64.1 103.4 71.0 100.4 70.5C97.4 69.9 92.7 59.8 88.7 57.5C84.7 55.2 80.4 57.7 76.3 56.6C72.2 55.4 67.0 53.0 64.0 50.4C61.1 47.8 57.1 43.8 58.6 41.0C60.2 38.1 68.9 34.8 73.5 33.2C78.1 31.5 82.9 31.9 86.1 31.0C89.3 30.1 88.1 27.0 92.5 27.8C96.9 28.6 110.7 32.8 112.7 35.8C114.8 38.8 105.0 41.7 104.9 45.7C104.9 49.7 114.2 57.7 112.5 59.8C110.7 61.8 98.9 58.6 94.4 58.0C89.8 57.4 89.9 55.7 85.1 56.1C80.2 56.5 69.1 60.8 65.1 60.6C61.1 60.3 59.8 57.4 61.0 54.6C62.2 51.8 70.4 46.7 72.2 43.5C74.1 40.4 69.4 38.0 71.9 35.5C74.4 33.1 82.4 30.0 87.4 28.7C92.3 27.4 97.6 25.6 101.7 27.7C105.8 29.8 110.4 37.9 112.2 41.3C113.9 44.8 113.4 45.0 112.0 48.3C110.7 51.7 106.5 58.7 104.1 61.3C101.7 63.9 100.4 62.5 97.8 63.9C95.2 65.4 92.0 70.2 88.5 70.1C85.1 70.0 80.8 65.0 77.2 63.4C73.6 61.9 68.7 63.1 67.0 60.5C65.3 57.9 65.5 52.2 66.8 47.8C68.0 43.5 70.7 38.0 74.5 34.7C78.2 31.4 84.6 29.3 89.2 28.1C93.8 26.9 99.0 25.8 102.3 27.3C105.5 28.8 107.1 32.7 108.7 37.1C110.2 41.5 111.7 49.3 111.3 53.7C110.9 58.1 109.2 61.6 106.3 63.5C103.5 65.3 96.8 62.2 94.2 64.6C91.7 67.0 93.8 76.9 91.2 78.1C88.6 79.2 82.6 74.9 78.7 71.3C74.7 67.7 69.0 60.8 67.3 56.3C65.7 51.9 65.2 47.3 68.6 44.7C72.0 42.2 83.3 42.2 87.9 40.9C92.6 39.6 94.1 38.8 96.3 36.8C98.6 34.8 97.6 27.6 101.4 28.8C105.2 30.0 116.2 40.3 118.9 44.0C121.7 47.7 118.1 49.7 117.9 50.8\"\/><ellipse class=\"ey\" cx=\"86.3\" cy=\"40.0\" rx=\"4.1\" ry=\"4.9\"\/><circle class=\"pu\" cx=\"85.3\" cy=\"39.0\" r=\"2.1\"\/><ellipse class=\"ey\" cx=\"97.3\" cy=\"40.0\" rx=\"4.1\" ry=\"4.9\"\/><circle class=\"pu\" cx=\"96.3\" cy=\"39.0\" r=\"2.1\"\/><path class=\"ag\" d=\"M111 18l5-5M118 28l6-2\"\/><path class=\"th\" d=\"M66.0 69.0c-6 6 -12 1 -18 7\"\/><\/svg><\/div><div class=\"tx\"><p class=\"lb\">Part two of three<\/p><h2 id=\"part-2\">Why the precise word matters<\/h2><p class=\"sb\">Naming outside the laboratory, and the difference between feeling bad and feeling disappointed<\/p><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d12c95ff wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"it-works-outside-the-laboratory-too\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">It works outside the laboratory too<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Looking at pictures in a scanner is a long way from real fear. So the same research group tested the idea somewhere much closer to therapy. People who were afraid of spiders were brought close to a live spider again and again, a version of the <span class=\"gl\" tabindex=\"0\" aria-describedby=\"gd-2\"><em class=\"eqi\">exposure<\/em><span class=\"gd\" role=\"tooltip\" id=\"gd-2\"><b>exposure<\/b>In therapy for fears and anxiety, facing the thing you fear gradually and repeatedly, in a safe and planned way, so that the fear response has a chance to ease.<\/span><\/span> therapists use for fears. Some put their feelings into words as they did it. Others were asked to reframe the situation, to distract themselves, or to do nothing extra.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">A week later, faced with a different spider in a different room, the people who\u2019d put their feelings into words had a smaller physical fear response than every other group, measured by how much their skin sweated. They didn\u2019t say they felt any less afraid, though. And <strong class=\"eqb\">the more fear words people used, the more their fear response came down<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">An earlier study by the same group found a similar lasting effect with pictures: images seen alongside an emotion word got a smaller physical reaction a week later than images seen without one.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"bad-is-not-a-feeling-you-can-do-much-with\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">Bad isn\u2019t a feeling you can do much with<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Think of two versions of the same evening. In one, you get home and all you know is that you feel bad. In the other, you know you feel left out, because your friends made plans without you. The second one hurts just as much, but it tells you something.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Psychologists call this <em class=\"eqi\">emotional granularity<\/em>: how finely you can tell one feeling from another. Some people describe a hard day as just bad or stressed. Others can tell apart being disappointed, embarrassed, resentful, lonely or overwhelmed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Researchers who reviewed this work describe people with more finely grained emotions as less likely to turn to binge drinking, aggression or self-harm when they\u2019re very distressed, and as having less severe anxiety and depression. A study that followed teenagers found that those who were less able to tell their negative emotions apart were more affected by stressful events: for them, stress was more closely tied to low mood day to day, and to rises in depression later on.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">These are links, and they don\u2019t prove that learning more emotion words will protect anyone on its own. Across many studies, the link is real but modest. Still, it makes sense. <strong class=\"eqb\">A precise word tends to point somewhere<\/strong>. Disappointment says something mattered to you. Resentment says something felt unfair. Loneliness says you need people. Bad, on its own, points nowhere in particular.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">That may be why it helps. In two studies that followed people through their everyday lives, people who named their feelings loosely didn\u2019t choose worse ways of coping than anyone else. But the ways they chose tended to work less well for them.<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<style>.eqp .eq-kp{display:grid;grid-template-columns:auto minmax(0,1fr);gap:4px 16px;align-items:start;background:#f7f1f2;border:0;border-left:4px solid #3a3442;border-radius:4px 18px 18px 4px;padding:20px 26px;margin:6px 0 34px}.eqp .eq-kp .mk{grid-row:1\/3;width:40px;height:40px;border-radius:50%;background:#fff;color:#3a3442;display:flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center}.eqp .eq-kp .mk svg{width:21px;height:21px}.eqp .eq-kp .k{font-family:\"Work Sans\",sans-serif;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.16em;text-transform:uppercase;color:#3a3442;margin:2px 0 4px}.eqp .eq-kp .t{font-family:\"Work Sans\",sans-serif;font-size:clamp(15px,calc(10.6px + .72vw),19px);font-weight:500;line-height:1.55;color:#2a2622;margin:0}@media(max-width:560px){.eqp .eq-kp{grid-template-columns:minmax(0,1fr);padding:18px 20px}.eqp .eq-kp .mk{grid-row:auto;width:34px;height:34px}}<\/style><aside class=\"eq-kp\"><span class=\"mk\" aria-hidden=\"true\"><svg viewBox=\"0 0 24 24\" fill=\"none\" stroke=\"currentColor\" stroke-width=\"1.7\" stroke-linecap=\"round\" stroke-linejoin=\"round\"><path d=\"M6.5 3.5h11a1 1 0 0 1 1 1v15.6a.5.5 0 0 1-.78.42L12 16.4l-5.72 4.12a.5.5 0 0 1-.78-.42V4.5a1 1 0 0 1 1-1z\"\/><\/svg><\/span><p class=\"k\">Worth noting<\/p><p class=\"t\">\u201cBad\u201d is a fine place to start. A more exact word, like left out, disappointed or resentful, is a clue to what you need next.<\/p><\/aside>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"margin-top:92px;margin-bottom:34px\"><div class=\"wt-part tm\"><div class=\"no\"><svg viewBox=\"44 0 90 90\" aria-hidden=\"true\" focusable=\"false\"><path class=\"tg\" style=\"stroke-width:1.2\" d=\"M119.1 47.8C118.4 49.7 117.1 56.7 115.1 59.2C113.2 61.7 111.0 62.2 107.2 62.8C103.4 63.4 96.6 63.1 92.1 62.6C87.7 62.2 84.1 62.0 80.4 60.1C76.6 58.2 71.8 54.7 69.7 51.1C67.5 47.5 66.7 42.9 67.5 38.3C68.3 33.7 70.9 26.4 74.6 23.5C78.2 20.6 84.1 21.2 89.3 20.9C94.6 20.7 102.0 20.6 106.0 22.0C110.0 23.4 111.4 25.9 113.3 29.1C115.2 32.4 116.0 37.7 117.3 41.6C118.5 45.4 122.7 48.6 120.6 52.2C118.5 55.8 110.2 61.7 104.7 63.3C99.2 64.9 92.0 62.7 87.7 61.7C83.4 60.8 81.4 60.2 78.9 57.5C76.4 54.8 74.5 49.2 72.7 45.5C71.0 41.8 67.5 39.1 68.3 35.3C69.2 31.5 73.8 25.8 77.8 22.6C81.8 19.5 88.1 16.8 92.2 16.5C96.4 16.3 98.7 19.1 102.7 21.2C106.7 23.3 112.7 25.6 116.0 29.0C119.4 32.4 123.4 37.9 122.9 41.8C122.5 45.7 116.3 49.9 113.3 52.6C110.3 55.3 108.8 57.0 105.0 57.9C101.2 58.9 95.8 58.7 90.6 58.2C85.5 57.8 77.8 57.3 74.3 55.1C70.8 53.0 69.7 48.5 69.4 45.2C69.2 41.9 72.0 38.6 73.0 35.3C73.9 32.0 72.5 28.3 75.3 25.5C78.2 22.7 85.0 19.9 90.0 18.5C95.1 17.2 100.6 15.3 105.8 17.3C111.1 19.3 119.2 26.6 121.4 30.4C123.6 34.3 119.7 37.3 119.2 40.5C118.6 43.7 119.8 45.8 117.9 49.7C115.9 53.5 111.7 61.1 107.7 63.6C103.7 66.1 98.4 65.6 94.1 64.7C89.9 63.9 86.6 61.4 82.1 58.4C77.6 55.4 68.4 50.5 67.3 46.7C66.1 42.9 73.1 39.3 75.3 35.6C77.5 32.0 78.1 27.4 80.4 24.9C82.7 22.4 84.7 21.8 89.1 20.5C93.6 19.3 102.2 16.3 107.2 17.5C112.3 18.6 117.3 23.5 119.3 27.3C121.3 31.0 120.3 35.5 119.2 39.9C118.1 44.4 115.3 50.7 112.7 53.8C110.1 57.0 107.4 57.7 103.6 58.9C99.8 60.2 94.3 61.1 89.6 61.2C84.9 61.4 79.1 62.1 75.4 59.7C71.7 57.2 68.2 51.0 67.4 46.7C66.7 42.3 69.4 37.3 71.1 33.6C72.8 29.9 73.8 26.4 77.5 24.4C81.2 22.4 88.3 22.8 93.4 21.8C98.4 20.8 102.9 16.8 107.6 18.5C112.3 20.1 119.1 27.6 121.6 31.7C124.1 35.8 123.3 39.8 122.4 43.1C121.4 46.4 118.5 49.2 116.0 51.6C113.5 54.1 111.6 55.3 107.5 57.8C103.4 60.2 95.7 66.7 91.4 66.4C87.1 66.0 85.5 58.8 81.6 55.6C77.8 52.5 70.3 50.4 68.2 47.4C66.1 44.4 67.1 40.7 69.0 37.7C70.9 34.7 76.8 31.0 79.8 29.3C82.7 27.6 83.0 28.0 86.6 27.4C90.3 26.9 96.6 24.8 101.8 25.9C107.0 27.0 115.2 30.8 117.8 34.1C120.5 37.3 118.4 42.0 117.8 45.5C117.2 49.0 117.3 52.0 114.1 55.1C110.9 58.1 103.2 61.4 98.5 63.8C93.9 66.2 89.9 69.4 85.9 69.3C81.8 69.1 77.7 65.8 74.2 62.8C70.6 59.8 66.5 55.4 64.6 51.5C62.8 47.6 61.9 42.9 63.2 39.6C64.4 36.3 68.2 34.4 72.1 31.8C76.0 29.3 81.6 25.3 86.4 24.3C91.1 23.3 97.3 24.3 100.5 25.7C103.6 27.2 102.8 30.0 105.4 33.1C107.9 36.1 114.1 42.3 115.9 44.1\"\/><ellipse class=\"bg\" cx=\"83.0\" cy=\"40.0\" rx=\"5.6\" ry=\"4.4\"\/><ellipse class=\"bg\" cx=\"93.0\" cy=\"40.0\" rx=\"5.6\" ry=\"4.4\"\/><path class=\"lid\" d=\"M78.8 39.5q4.2 3.6 8.4 0M88.8 39.5q4.2 3.6 8.4 0\"\/><path class=\"lid\" d=\"M84.0 47.5q4 3 8 0\"\/><\/svg><\/div><div class=\"tx\"><p class=\"lb\">Part three of three<\/p><h2 id=\"part-3\">How to name it to tame it<\/h2><p class=\"sb\">Finding the word, keeping it short, and knowing when to stop<\/p><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d12c95ff wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"find-the-most-accurate-word-you-can\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">Find the most accurate word you can<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">So what does this look like on an ordinary Tuesday? When you notice a strong feeling, pause long enough to ask what it is. Start broad if you need to, with something like upset or on edge, then see if there\u2019s a more exact word underneath. Is it anxious, or is it dread about one particular thing? Is it anger, or is it hurt that has come out as anger? You don\u2019t need the perfect word. <strong class=\"eqb\">A slightly more precise word is usually more useful than a vague one.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">If the words don\u2019t come easily, that\u2019s normal, and it can be learned. In one small study, people who spent time learning about emotions got better at telling their negative feelings apart. A list of feeling words helps, and so do <a href=\"\/feelings-map\/\" style=\"color:#b83a55;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1.5px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">our Feelings Map<\/a> and the word finder below.<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div style=\"margin-top:34px;margin-bottom:40px\"><figure class=\"nt-wf\" id=\"nt-wf\"><div class=\"hd\"><p class=\"ti\">Find the word<\/p><p class=\"un\">try it here<\/p><\/div><p class=\"mix\" id=\"nt-mix\" hidden>First feeling: <b id=\"nt-mw\"><\/b>. Now the second one.<\/p><p class=\"q\" id=\"nt-q1\"><span class=\"n\">1<\/span>Start broad. Which word is closest to how you feel?<\/p><div class=\"fam\" role=\"group\" aria-labelledby=\"nt-q1\"><button type=\"button\" data-f=\"stressed\" aria-pressed=\"true\">stressed<\/button><button type=\"button\" data-f=\"anxious\" aria-pressed=\"false\">anxious<\/button><button type=\"button\" data-f=\"angry\" aria-pressed=\"false\">angry<\/button><button type=\"button\" data-f=\"sad\" aria-pressed=\"false\">sad<\/button><button type=\"button\" data-f=\"bad about myself\" aria-pressed=\"false\">bad about myself<\/button><button type=\"button\" data-f=\"good\" aria-pressed=\"false\">good<\/button><button type=\"button\" data-f=\"bad\" aria-pressed=\"false\">just bad<\/button><\/div><select class=\"fsel\" id=\"nt-fsel\" aria-labelledby=\"nt-q1\"><option value=\"stressed\">stressed<\/option><option value=\"anxious\">anxious<\/option><option value=\"angry\">angry<\/option><option value=\"sad\">sad<\/option><option value=\"bad about myself\">bad about myself<\/option><option value=\"good\">good<\/option><option value=\"bad\">just bad<\/option><\/select><div class=\"grp on\" data-f=\"stressed\"><p class=\"q\"><span class=\"n\">2<\/span>Is there a more exact word underneath?<\/p><div class=\"words\"><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something may need to come off the pile.\"><b>overwhelmed<\/b><span>Too much, all at once.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A deadline, or someone else\u2019s expectations.\"><b>pressured<\/b><span>Something is expected of you, and soon.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A goal that feels blocked.\"><b>frustrated<\/b><span>Something keeps getting in the way.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something mattered to you.\"><b>disappointed<\/b><span>Something you hoped for didn\u2019t happen.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something you care about feels uncertain.\"><b>worried<\/b><span>Something might go wrong.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A need for rest rather than more effort.\"><b>exhausted<\/b><span>There\u2019s nothing left to give.<\/span><\/button><\/div><\/div><div class=\"grp\" data-f=\"anxious\"><p class=\"q\"><span class=\"n\">2<\/span>Is there a more exact word underneath?<\/p><div class=\"words\"><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something ahead feels important.\"><b>nervous<\/b><span>Before something that matters.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A specific event you\u2019d rather avoid.\"><b>dread<\/b><span>One particular thing is coming, and you don\u2019t want it to.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something worth looking at more closely.\"><b>uneasy<\/b><span>Something feels off, and you\u2019re not sure what.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Your body is on high alert.\"><b>panicky<\/b><span>Your body is racing and you want to get away.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A need for reassurance or acceptance.\"><b>insecure<\/b><span>Unsure whether you\u2019re good enough.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Energy with nowhere to go.\"><b>restless<\/b><span>You can\u2019t settle to anything.<\/span><\/button><\/div><\/div><div class=\"grp\" data-f=\"angry\"><p class=\"q\"><span class=\"n\">2<\/span>Is there a more exact word underneath?<\/p><div class=\"words\"><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"You may be running low, or something small keeps repeating.\"><b>irritated<\/b><span>Small things keep grating.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something felt unfair.\"><b>resentful<\/b><span>Something felt unfair, and it lingers.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A relationship that matters to you.\"><b>hurt<\/b><span>Someone\u2019s words or actions stung.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Trust that has been broken.\"><b>betrayed<\/b><span>Someone you trusted let you down.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something you value feels at risk.\"><b>jealous<\/b><span>Someone has something, or someone, you want.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something you want to move forward.\"><b>impatient<\/b><span>Things are moving more slowly than you want.<\/span><\/button><\/div><\/div><div class=\"grp\" data-f=\"sad\"><p class=\"q\"><span class=\"n\">2<\/span>Is there a more exact word underneath?<\/p><div class=\"words\"><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A need for people.\"><b>lonely<\/b><span>Wanting connection that isn\u2019t there.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A wish to belong.\"><b>left out<\/b><span>Others are together without you.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A goal that may need a new approach, or more support.\"><b>discouraged<\/b><span>Your effort doesn\u2019t seem to be paying off.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"How much it mattered.\"><b>grief<\/b><span>Missing someone or something you\u2019ve lost.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something mattered to you.\"><b>disappointed<\/b><span>Something you hoped for didn\u2019t happen.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Being worn down for a while, or a low mood that\u2019s worth taking seriously if it lasts.\"><b>empty<\/b><span>Flat, and finding it hard to feel much.<\/span><\/button><\/div><\/div><div class=\"grp\" data-f=\"bad about myself\"><p class=\"q\"><span class=\"n\">2<\/span>Is there a more exact word underneath?<\/p><div class=\"words\"><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"How you appear to other people.\"><b>embarrassed<\/b><span>Seen in a moment you\u2019d rather not have been.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A harsh judgment of yourself.\"><b>ashamed<\/b><span>Feeling that something is wrong with you.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A value, and perhaps something to put right.\"><b>guilty<\/b><span>You did something that goes against your own values.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A wish to be accepted.\"><b>self-conscious<\/b><span>Aware of being watched or judged.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something you\u2019d do differently next time.\"><b>regretful<\/b><span>Wishing you\u2019d done it differently.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"A need for privacy or safety.\"><b>exposed<\/b><span>Something private has been seen.<\/span><\/button><\/div><\/div><div class=\"grp\" data-f=\"good\"><p class=\"q\"><span class=\"n\">2<\/span>Is there a more exact word underneath?<\/p><div class=\"words\"><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something is working, and it\u2019s worth noticing.\"><b>content<\/b><span>Things feel like enough, just as they are.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something had been weighing on you.\"><b>relieved<\/b><span>Something you feared didn\u2019t happen, or is over.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something you worked at mattered to you.\"><b>proud<\/b><span>Pleased with something you did.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Someone or something that helped.\"><b>grateful<\/b><span>Thankful for someone or something.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something ahead that you want.\"><b>hopeful<\/b><span>Something good feels possible.<\/span><\/button><button type=\"button\" aria-pressed=\"false\" data-p=\"Something you care about is coming.\"><b>excited<\/b><span>Looking forward, with energy.<\/span><\/button><\/div><\/div><div class=\"grp\" data-f=\"bad\"><p class=\"bad\">Bad is a start, but it points nowhere in particular. Which of the words above is it closest to? Even a rough guess gives you somewhere to go.<\/p><\/div><div class=\"own\"><p class=\"lb\">None of these fits? Use your own word.<\/p><input type=\"text\" id=\"nt-own\" maxlength=\"40\" autocomplete=\"off\" placeholder=\"The word that fits\" aria-label=\"Your own word\"><button type=\"button\" id=\"nt-use\">Use this word<\/button><\/div><div class=\"res\" id=\"nt-res\" tabindex=\"-1\" aria-live=\"polite\"><p class=\"from\" id=\"nt-from\"><\/p><p class=\"say\">Right now I feel <b id=\"nt-word\"><\/b><span id=\"nt-and\" hidden>, and I also feel <b id=\"nt-word2\"><\/b><\/span>.<\/p><p class=\"pt\" id=\"nt-pt\"><\/p><p class=\"pt\" id=\"nt-pt2\"><\/p><p class=\"hlp\" id=\"nt-hlp\" hidden>If it\u2019s lasted for weeks, or it comes with thoughts of ending your life, please talk to someone now. <a href=\"\/suicidal-thoughts\/#if-it-is-you\">What to do when suicidal thoughts show up<\/a> has the next steps.<\/p><p class=\"gd2\" id=\"nt-good\" hidden>Naming a good feeling can soften it a little too, so with this one you might just enjoy it.<\/p><p class=\"ok\">That\u2019s enough. It doesn\u2019t need an explanation, a justification or a verdict.<\/p><div class=\"ctl\"><button type=\"button\" id=\"nt-two\">Add a second feeling<\/button><button type=\"button\" id=\"nt-back\">Try another word<\/button><button type=\"button\" id=\"nt-again\">Start again<\/button><\/div><\/div><p class=\"priv\">Nothing you choose or type here is saved or sent anywhere.<\/p><figcaption>It works for good feelings too, and two feelings at once are normal.<\/figcaption><script>(function(){\nvar f=document.getElementById(\"nt-wf\");if(!f){return;}\nvar RM=false;if(window.matchMedia){RM=window.matchMedia(\"(prefers-reduced-motion: reduce)\").matches;}\nvar $=function(id){return document.getElementById(id);};\nvar each=function(l,fn){Array.prototype.forEach.call(l,fn);};\nvar fams=f.querySelectorAll(\".fam button\"),grps=f.querySelectorAll(\".grp\"),ws=f.querySelectorAll(\".words button\");\nvar res=$(\"nt-res\"),from=$(\"nt-from\"),word=$(\"nt-word\"),word2=$(\"nt-word2\"),and=$(\"nt-and\"),pt=$(\"nt-pt\"),pt2=$(\"nt-pt2\");\nvar hlp=$(\"nt-hlp\"),LOW=\/^(empty|hopeless|numb|worthless|suicidal|despair|despairing|trapped|helpless)$\/;\nvar good=$(\"nt-good\"),mix=$(\"nt-mix\"),two=$(\"nt-two\"),own=$(\"nt-own\"),cur=\"stressed\",first=null,last=null;\nvar low=function(p){return p.charAt(0).toLowerCase()+p.slice(1);};\nvar cap=function(s){return s.charAt(0).toUpperCase()+s.slice(1);};\nvar setFam=function(k){cur=k;var fs=$(\"nt-fsel\");if(fs){fs.value=k;}each(fams,function(b){b.setAttribute(\"aria-pressed\",String(b.getAttribute(\"data-f\")===k));});\n each(grps,function(g){g.className=g.getAttribute(\"data-f\")===k?\"grp on\":\"grp\";});\n each(ws,function(b){b.setAttribute(\"aria-pressed\",\"false\");});f.classList.remove(\"done\");};\nvar show=function(w,p,mine){last={w:w,p:p,fam:mine?\"own\":cur};\n if(first){word.textContent=first.w;word2.textContent=w;and.hidden=false;\n  pt.textContent=first.p?cap(first.w)+\" often points to: \"+low(first.p):\"\";\n  pt2.textContent=p?cap(w)+\" often points to: \"+low(p):\"\";\n  from.textContent=\"two feelings at once\";}\n else{word.textContent=w;and.hidden=true;pt2.textContent=\"\";\n  pt.textContent=p?\"What it often points to: \"+low(p):\"\";\n  from.textContent=mine?\"in your own words\":(cur===\"bad\"?\"\":\"from \"+cur+\" to \"+w);}\n var gs=[];if(first){if(first.fam===\"good\"){gs.push(first.w);}}if(last.fam===\"good\"){gs.push(last.w);}good.hidden=!gs.length;\n good.textContent=gs.length>1?\"Naming a good feeling can soften it a little too, so with \u201c\"+gs[0]+\"\u201d and \u201c\"+gs[1]+\"\u201d you might just enjoy them.\":\"Naming a good feeling can soften it a little too, so with \"+(first?\"\u201c\"+gs[0]+\"\u201d\":\"this one\")+\" you might just enjoy it.\";\n hlp.hidden=!(LOW.test(w)||(first?LOW.test(first.w):false));\n two.hidden=!!first;mix.hidden=true;\n f.classList.remove(\"done\");void f.offsetWidth;f.classList.add(\"done\");\n res.focus({preventScroll:true});};\neach(fams,function(b){b.addEventListener(\"click\",function(){setFam(b.getAttribute(\"data-f\"));});});\nvar fsel=$(\"nt-fsel\");if(fsel){fsel.addEventListener(\"change\",function(){setFam(fsel.value);});}\neach(ws,function(b){b.addEventListener(\"click\",function(){each(ws,function(x){x.setAttribute(\"aria-pressed\",String(x===b));});\n show(b.querySelector(\"b\").textContent,b.getAttribute(\"data-p\"));});});\nvar useOwn=function(){var v=own.value.replace(\/^\\s+|\\s+$\/g,\"\").replace(\/[.\\s]+$\/,\"\");if(!v){own.focus();return;}\n each(ws,function(x){x.setAttribute(\"aria-pressed\",\"false\");});show(v.toLowerCase(),\"\",true);};\n$(\"nt-use\").addEventListener(\"click\",useOwn);\nown.addEventListener(\"keydown\",function(e){if(e.key===\"Enter\"){e.preventDefault();useOwn();}});\ntwo.addEventListener(\"click\",function(){first=last;$(\"nt-mw\").textContent=first.w;own.value=\"\";setFam(cur);mix.hidden=false;\n var b=f.querySelector(\".fam button[aria-pressed=true]\");if(b){b.focus({preventScroll:true});}});\n$(\"nt-back\").addEventListener(\"click\",function(){f.classList.remove(\"done\");each(ws,function(x){x.setAttribute(\"aria-pressed\",\"false\");});\n mix.hidden=!first;var g=f.querySelector(\".grp.on button\");if(g){g.focus({preventScroll:true});}});\n$(\"nt-again\").addEventListener(\"click\",function(){first=null;own.value=\"\";mix.hidden=true;and.hidden=true;setFam(\"stressed\");fams[0].focus({preventScroll:true});});\n})();<\/script><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d12c95ff wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"keep-it-short\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">Keep it short<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">In these studies, people usually used a single word or a short sentence. <strong class=\"eqb\">The label was a description, not a story<\/strong>. \u201cI feel embarrassed\u201d is enough. You can say it quietly to yourself, write it down, or say it to someone you trust.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">If you do say it to someone, keep it just as short. \u201cI don\u2019t think I\u2019m angry, I think I\u2019m hurt\u201d can change a whole conversation. So can \u201cI\u2019m feeling a bit left out tonight\u201d, said before it turns into an argument about the dishes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"name-it-then-let-it-be\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">Name it, then let it be<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">It\u2019s tempting to treat a name as the start of an investigation: why do I feel this, what does it say about me, what should I have done differently? That\u2019s a different process, and it can turn into <a href=\"\/overthinking\/\" style=\"color:#b83a55;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1.5px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">going over the same ground again and again<\/a>. <strong class=\"eqb\">Name it to tame it works best as a light touch.<\/strong> You notice the feeling, you call it what it is, and you carry on, a little steadier than before. You don\u2019t always have to fix a feeling to make it smaller. If your body is still racing, a few slow breaths out can finish the job.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Naming has a limit, though. In two studies, people who named their emotions before trying to reframe what they were looking at, or to simply accept their feelings, ended up feeling worse than people who reframed or accepted without naming first. The researchers think naming may make a feeling more fixed, and harder to change afterward. So naming is one tool among several. <strong class=\"eqb\">If you already know you want to look at a situation differently, you don\u2019t have to name the feeling first.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"it-helps-with-children-too\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:72px;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">It helps with children too<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Siegel and Bryson\u2019s original advice was for parents. When a child is swept up in a big feeling, <strong class=\"eqb\">naming it for them, calmly and without trying to argue them out of it, can help<\/strong>: \u201cYou\u2019re really disappointed that the park is closed.\u201d It gives them a word for what\u2019s happening in their body, and tells them the feeling can be seen and talked about. Later, once things are calm, they suggest helping the child tell the story of what happened. In their book, <strong class=\"eqb\">that retelling is the heart of name it to tame it<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">It isn\u2019t only their view. In a trial of a parenting program that helped parents tune in to their children\u2019s feelings and talk about them, parents used more feeling words, children understood emotions better, and both parents and teachers reported fewer behavior problems. When a child is upset about how something went, the same order works: the feeling first, the lesson later.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Teenagers often find this harder than younger children do. Telling feelings apart seems to dip in the teenage years before it rises again in adulthood. So with a teenager, a gentle guess may work better than a question they have to answer: \u201cSounds more like embarrassed than angry?\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div style=\"margin-top:10px;margin-bottom:40px\"><figure class=\"nt-vid\" style=\"margin:0\"><div style=\"position:relative;width:100%;padding-top:56.25%;border-radius:16px;overflow:hidden;background:#1f1b18\"><iframe src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube-nocookie.com\/embed\/ZcDLzppD4Jc\" title=\"Dan Siegel: Name it to tame it\" loading=\"lazy\" allow=\"accelerometer; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture\" allowfullscreen style=\"position:absolute;inset:0;width:100%;height:100%;border:0\"><\/iframe><\/div><figcaption style=\"font-family:&quot;Work Sans&quot;,sans-serif;font-size:15.5px;line-height:1.6;color:#6b6259;margin:12px 0 0\">Daniel Siegel explains name it to tame it the way he teaches it to parents.<\/figcaption><\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-background has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-7fb17cdc wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\" style=\"background-color:#f3f4f8;border-color:#dde1ea;border-width:1.5px;border-style:solid;border-radius:20px;margin-top:46px;margin-bottom:46px;padding:34px 38px\">\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:12px;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:0.16em;line-height:1.4\">WHAT THE RESEARCH SUPPORTS<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Across a number of studies, putting feelings into words has lowered distress in the moment about as much as deliberately reframing or distracting, has quieted the brain\u2019s threat response in imaging studies, and, in people afraid of spiders, has reduced the body\u2019s fear response a week later. People who can tell their emotions apart more precisely tend to cope better with distress, though the link is modest.<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-background has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d4ad4c5d wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\" style=\"background-color:#fbf4e6;border-color:#eedcb9;border-width:1.5px;border-style:solid;border-radius:20px;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:46px;padding:34px 38px\">\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#3a3442;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:12px;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:0.16em;line-height:1.4\">WORTH BEING CLEAR ABOUT<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:26px;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Most of this research took place in laboratories, often with pictures rather than real events, and many of the studies were small. Much of it also comes from one research group, and independent labs have tested it less often. In the spider study, labeling changed the body\u2019s response but not how afraid people said they felt. Naming a feeling can also make it harder to reframe afterward, and the research on emotional precision shows links rather than proof that learning more words protects anyone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#2a2622;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0;font-size:clamp(14.082px, 0.88rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.786), 21px);line-height:1.68\">Name it to tame it is a small, useful skill, not a treatment. If your feelings are often overwhelming, hard to identify at all, or getting in the way of your life and relationships, therapy can be a place to learn to recognize them with someone alongside you. <strong class=\"eqb\" style=\"color:#8a3040\">If the word you keep landing on is hopeless or empty, and it\u2019s lasted for weeks, or you\u2019re having thoughts of ending your life, please talk to someone now.<\/strong> <a href=\"\/suicidal-thoughts\/#if-it-is-you\" style=\"color:#b83a55;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1.5px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">What to do when suicidal thoughts show up<\/a> has the next steps.<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-background has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-ea643415 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\" style=\"background-color:#faf8f3;border-color:#e8e1d5;border-width:1.5px;border-style:solid;border-radius:18px;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:44px;padding:30px 34px\">\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#6b6259;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:14px;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:0.16em;line-height:1.4\">REFERENCES<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" style=\"color:#524a42;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0;font-size:clamp(14px, 0.875rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.17), 15.5px);line-height:1.7\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1093\/scan\/nsw121\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Brooks, J. A., Shablack, H., Gendron, M., Satpute, A. B., Parrish, M. H., &amp; Lindquist, K. A. (2017). The role of language in the experience and perception of emotion: A neuroimaging meta&#45;analysis. <em>Social Cognitive and Affective Neuroscience, 12<\/em>(2), 169-183.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1111\/j.1469-7610.2010.02303.x\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Havighurst, S. S., Wilson, K. R., Harley, A. E., Prior, M. R., &amp; Kehoe, C. (2010). Tuning in to Kids: Improving emotion socialization practices in parents of preschool children: Findings from a community trial. <em>Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 51<\/em>(12), 1342-1350.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1177\/0956797619838763\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Kalokerinos, E. K., Erbas, Y., Ceulemans, E., &amp; Kuppens, P. (2019). Differentiate to regulate: Low negative emotion differentiation is associated with ineffective use but not selection of emotion&#45;regulation strategies. <em>Psychological Science, 30<\/em>(6), 863-879.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1177\/0963721414550708\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Kashdan, T. B., Barrett, L. F., &amp; McKnight, P. E. (2015). Unpacking emotion differentiation: Transforming unpleasant experience by perceiving distinctions in negativity. <em>Current Directions in Psychological Science, 24<\/em>(1), 10-16.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1177\/0956797612443830\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Kircanski, K., Lieberman, M. D., &amp; Craske, M. G. (2012). Feelings into words: Contributions of language to exposure therapy. <em>Psychological Science, 23<\/em>(10), 1086-1091.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1111\/j.1467-9280.2007.01916.x\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Lieberman, M. D., Eisenberger, N. I., Crockett, M. J., Tom, S. M., Pfeifer, J. H., &amp; Way, B. M. (2007). Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling disrupts amygdala activity in response to affective stimuli. <em>Psychological Science, 18<\/em>(5), 421-428.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1037\/a0023503\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Lieberman, M. D., Inagaki, T. K., Tabibnia, G., &amp; Crockett, M. J. (2011). Subjective responses to emotional stimuli during labeling, reappraisal, and distraction. <em>Emotion, 11<\/em>(3), 468-480.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1177\/0956797618773357\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Nook, E. C., Sasse, S. F., Lambert, H. K., McLaughlin, K. A., &amp; Somerville, L. H. (2018). The nonlinear development of emotion differentiation: Granular emotional experience is low in adolescence. <em>Psychological Science, 29<\/em>(8), 1346-1357.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1007\/s42761-021-00036-y\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Nook, E. C., Satpute, A. B., &amp; Ochsner, K. N. (2021). Emotion naming impedes both cognitive reappraisal and mindful acceptance strategies of emotion regulation. <em>Affective Science, 2<\/em>(2), 187-198.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1037\/emo0000968\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Seah, T. H. S., &amp; Coifman, K. G. (2022). Emotion differentiation and behavioral dysregulation in clinical and nonclinical samples: A meta&#45;analysis. <em>Emotion, 22<\/em>(7), 1686-1697.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li>Siegel, D. J., &amp; Bryson, T. P. (2011). <em>The whole-brain child: 12 revolutionary strategies to nurture your child&#8217;s developing mind<\/em>. Delacorte Press.<\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1037\/emo0000630\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Starr, L. R., Hershenberg, R., Shaw, Z. A., Li, Y. I., &amp; Santee, A. C. (2020). The perils of murky emotions: Emotion differentiation moderates the prospective relationship between naturalistic stress exposure and adolescent depression. <em>Emotion, 20<\/em>(6), 927-938.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1037\/1528-3542.8.3.307\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Tabibnia, G., Lieberman, M. D., &amp; Craske, M. G. (2008). The lasting effect of words on feelings: Words may facilitate exposure effects to threatening images. <em>Emotion, 8<\/em>(3), 307-317.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.1177\/1754073917742706\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Torre, J. B., &amp; Lieberman, M. D. (2018). Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling as implicit emotion regulation. <em>Emotion Review, 10<\/em>(2), 116-124.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/doi.org\/10.3389\/fpsyg.2021.703757\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Vedernikova, E., Kuppens, P., &amp; Erbas, Y. (2021). From knowledge to differentiation: Increasing emotion knowledge through an intervention increases negative emotion differentiation. <em>Frontiers in Psychology, 12<\/em>, Article 703757.<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#6b6259;margin-top:30px;margin-bottom:14px;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:0.16em;line-height:1.4\">BOOKS FROM OUR SHELF<\/p>\n\n\n\n<ol class=\"wp-block-list has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" style=\"color:#524a42;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0;font-size:clamp(14px, 0.875rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.17), 15.5px);line-height:1.7\">\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/us.macmillan.com\/books\/9781250212849\/permissiontofeel\/\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Brackett, M. A. (2019). <em>Permission to feel: Unlocking the power of emotions to help our kids, ourselves, and our society thrive<\/em>. Celadon Books.<\/a><\/li>\n\n\n\n<li><a href=\"https:\/\/www.hachettebookgroup.com\/titles\/anna-llenas\/the-color-monster\/9780316450010\/?lens=little-brown-books-for-young-readers\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\" style=\"color:inherit;text-decoration:underline;text-underline-offset:3px;text-decoration-thickness:1px;text-decoration-color:#e7b3c0\">Llenas, A. (2018). <em>The color monster: A story about emotions<\/em> [Children\u2019s book]. Little, Brown Books for Young Readers.<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ol>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"eq-lastrev\" style=\"margin:34px 0 0;font-family:&quot;Work Sans&quot;,sans-serif;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:.15em;text-transform:uppercase;line-height:1.5;color:#6b6259\">Last reviewed October 2026<\/p>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<style>.eqp{--rc-accent:#b92447;--rc-band:#f9e9ed;--rc-hover:#f4d9e0;--rc-bg:#faf8f3}.eqp .eq-rc-btn{display:none}.eqp .eq-rc{position:relative}.eqp .eq-rc li[hidden]{display:block;margin:0;padding:0;height:0;line-height:0;font-size:0}.eqp .eq-rc li.rc-off{display:none}.eqp .eq-rc.is-collapsed::after{content:\"\";position:absolute;left:0;right:0;bottom:0;height:76px;background:linear-gradient(to bottom,transparent,var(--rc-bg) 94%);pointer-events:none}.eqp .eq-rc ~ .eq-rc-btn{display:inline-flex;align-items:center;justify-content:center;gap:8px;box-sizing:border-box;min-width:260px;min-height:48px;margin:22px 0 0;padding:12px 26px;background:var(--rc-band);color:var(--rc-accent);border:1.5px solid var(--rc-accent);border-radius:9px;font-family:\"Work Sans\",system-ui,sans-serif;font-size:15px;font-weight:600;line-height:1.3;letter-spacing:normal;text-transform:none;text-decoration:none;text-align:center;box-shadow:none;cursor:pointer;-webkit-appearance:none;appearance:none;-webkit-tap-highlight-color:transparent}.eqp .eq-rc ~ .eq-rc-btn:hover{background:var(--rc-hover);color:var(--rc-accent)}.eqp .eq-rc ~ .eq-rc-btn:focus-visible{outline:3px solid var(--rc-accent);outline-offset:3px}.eqp .eq-rc-chev{flex:0 0 auto;width:8px;height:8px;margin-top:-4px;border-right:2px solid currentColor;border-bottom:2px solid currentColor;transform:rotate(45deg);transition:transform .2s ease}.eqp .eq-rc-btn[aria-expanded=\"true\"] .eq-rc-chev{margin-top:4px;transform:rotate(-135deg)}@media (max-width:640px){.eqp .eq-rc ~ .eq-rc-btn{display:flex;width:100%;min-width:0;margin:18px 0 0;padding:12px 10px}}@media 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a=e.target;\nwhile(a){\nif(a.tagName===\"A\"){break;}\na=a.parentNode;\n}\nif(!a){return;}\nif(!a.getAttribute){return;}\nvar h=a.getAttribute(\"href\");\nif(!h){return;}\nif(h.charAt(0)!==\"#\"){return;}\nreveal(targetOf(h));\n},true);\nwindow.addEventListener(\"hashchange\",fromHash);\nwindow.addEventListener(\"load\",fromHash);\nrun();\nif(document.readyState===\"loading\"){\ndocument.addEventListener(\"DOMContentLoaded\",run);\n}\n})();<\/script>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div style=\"margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:44px\"><a class=\"wt-next\" href=\"\/worry-time\/\"><span class=\"eyb\">Read next<\/span><span class=\"ti\">Worry Time<\/span><span class=\"wy\">Another way to give a difficult feeling somewhere to go: your worries get fifteen minutes and a notebook instead of the whole day.<\/span><\/a><\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-d2a766d4 wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\">\n\n\n<div style=\"margin-top:0px;margin-bottom:0px\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" width=\"2560\" height=\"1708\" src=\"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/mid-shot-woman-therapist-taking-notes-clipboard-scaled.jpg\" alt=\"A therapist taking notes on a clipboard during a session\" class=\"wp-image-230\" style=\"width:100%;height:340px;object-fit:cover;object-position:center 40%;border-radius:22px 22px 0 0;display:block\" srcset=\"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/mid-shot-woman-therapist-taking-notes-clipboard-scaled.jpg 2560w, https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/mid-shot-woman-therapist-taking-notes-clipboard-300x200.jpg 300w, https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/mid-shot-woman-therapist-taking-notes-clipboard-1024x683.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/mid-shot-woman-therapist-taking-notes-clipboard-768x512.jpg 768w, https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/wp-content\/uploads\/2024\/06\/mid-shot-woman-therapist-taking-notes-clipboard-1536x1025.jpg 1536w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 2560px) 100vw, 2560px\" \/><\/div>\n<div hidden data-eq-related=\"3436,2387,2778\"><\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-group has-background eq-ondark has-global-padding is-layout-constrained wp-container-core-group-is-layout-f761ea3b wp-block-group-is-layout-constrained\" style=\"background-color:#3a3442;border-radius:0px 0px 22px 22px;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:80px;padding:52px\">\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#f2c9d3;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:14px;font-size:12px;font-weight:700;letter-spacing:0.16em;line-height:1.4\">WORKING WITH THIS<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family\" id=\"when-feelings-are-hard-to-name\" style=\"color:#ffffff;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:18px;font-size:clamp(16.293px, 1.018rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.989), 25px);font-style:normal;font-weight:700;line-height:1.28\">When feelings are hard to name<\/h3>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-block-paragraph\" style=\"color:#ffffff;margin-top:0;margin-bottom:30px;font-size:clamp(14px, 0.875rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.455), 18px);line-height:1.7\">If your feelings often seem too big, too tangled or just hard to put into words, or they keep getting in the way of your sleep, work or relationships, you don\u2019t have to work them out alone. Talking with a therapist can help you understand what you feel, and what helps.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-buttons is-layout-flex wp-block-buttons-is-layout-flex\">\n<div class=\"wp-block-button\"><a class=\"wp-block-button__link has-text-color has-background has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-element-button\" href=\"\/individual-session\/\" style=\"border-radius:9px;color:#2a2622;background-color:#faf8f3;padding:15px 30px;font-size:clamp(14px, 0.875rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.284), 16.5px);font-weight:700\">Book a session<\/a><\/div>\n\n\n\n<div class=\"wp-block-button footer_b\"><a class=\"wp-block-button__link has-text-color has-work-sans-regular-font-family wp-element-button\" href=\"\/contact\/\" style=\"border-color:#e7b3c0;border-width:1.5px;border-style:solid;border-radius:9px;color:#ffffff;padding:15px 30px;font-size:clamp(14px, 0.875rem + ((1vw - 3.2px) * 0.284), 16.5px);font-weight:600\">Get in touch<\/a><\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n\n\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Why putting a feeling into words takes some of the heat out of it, why the precise word matters, and how to find it, for yourself or for a child<\/p>","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":4712,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"iawp_total_views":401,"footnotes":""},"categories":[15],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-2851","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-body-and-mind"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2851","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2851"}],"version-history":[{"count":20,"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2851\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":4762,"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2851\/revisions\/4762"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/4712"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2851"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2851"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/equilibriumpsychotherapy.net\/hr\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2851"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}